A Thorn in the Flesh
7/9/00
I asked God for strength, that I might achieve,
I was made weak, that I might learn humbly to obey.
I asked for health, that I might do greater things,
I was given infirmity, that I might do better things.
I asked for riches, that I might be happy,
I was given poverty, that I might be wise.
I asked for power, that I might have the praise of men,
I was given weakness, that I might feel the need of God.
I asked for all things, that I might enjoy life,
I was given life, that I might enjoy all things.
I got nothing I asked for - But everything I had hoped for.
Almost despite myself, my Unspoken prayers were answered.
I am, among all men, Most richly blessed.
This poem, written anonymously by a Civil War soldier, speaks of the struggles that comes when we try to override God’s will for us with our own desires and needs. Somehow, we always think we have a better plan than the one God prepared for us. God, we reason, does not understand how important a certain matter is to us. We can prove to God, we argue, how good it will be for everyone if things just go our way. We believe God to be all-powerful, but perhaps, just perhaps our way could work just as well. If I could just come across a little money, just a small sum, I could get myself back on track… If I could just have a good, loving relationship with someone, I could really be happy… If I could just focus on myself for a while, then I could really start helping others… If I could just, just…well, then I might be able to make God a priority again. If I could just… Like the man in the poem, we have our own ideas of what we want and what we need. God, however, has another agenda for us. If we would just put God at the center, let God take control, follow God’s will for our lives, then we might be the most richly blessed.
Paul struggled with these same issues himself. His struggle was, like most are at heart, an internal struggle. He wrestled with pride and boasting, battling against himself to keep his unruly emotions under control. However, something stopped him from being able to boast about himself completely. He never truly abandoned his faith and his reason in praise of self. Something held Paul back, something Paul called “the thorn in his flesh”. Scholars have wondered for centuries upon centuries what exactly Paul meant by saying that God had given him a thorn in the flesh. Was Paul in physical pain? Perhaps he suffered from an illness. Perhaps he had hallucinations. Maybe Paul spoke of a struggle with self-confidence. We will never know for sure what Paul meant - we will never know what Paul’s thorn was.
Yet, we can still glean knowledge and understanding from Paul’s experience on many levels. First, we can identify with Paul. Though we do not know the specifics in Paul’s case, we all have an idea of what a thorn in the flesh can be, because we all have our own thorns with which we must live. Second, we can learn from Paul’s example. We know how he responded to this thorn. We can study how Paul continued as a disciple despite this weight upon his weary shoulders. Finally, and most importantly, we can come to understand the nature of God and God’s grace and work better, through God’s actions in Paul’s life. We gain insight, though perhaps in small increments of knowledge, into the way God leads us and teaches us through our failings.
So, how do we, people standing on the brink of the 21st century, relate to Paul, a man alive during the birth and growth of a small movement called Christianity? Our surroundings are different than Paul’s were. Our possessions, occupations, customs - our whole way of living is different than the life and world that Paul knew. But there is one constant - that thorn in the flesh. We know, even if in vague terms and ideas, what the thorn is. Think of your own life and experiences for a moment. What is your thorn? What is the obstacle in your life that hinders you from doing what you could be and should be doing? Perhaps your thorn is a physical one. Today, like in Jesus’ day, we are surrounded by disease and sickness of many kinds. A couple of weeks ago I attended the Relay for Life in Rome, a twenty-four hour walk to raise funds and awareness to battle cancer. The track where the event was held was surrounded with luminaries of those who had died from or were struggling with cancer. The physical in our lives affects the emotional, intellectual, and spiritual. It can be a real thorn for us. A thorn can be emotional. Certainly we can all think of someone who battles with depression, anxiety, or mental illness. These thorns are so trying because it is hard to help or be helped in these situations. They are so personal and close-to-home. These emotional pains and struggles can be thorns in the flesh. The thorn can be intellectual, in the sense of being a true personal conflict we must resolve in our own minds and hearts. In a year of important elections, we are asked to consider our position on a number of issues that affect the lives of real people. Will we make the right choices? Our inner debates can be sharp thorns. Under the weight and stress of such a burden, in whatever form it takes, how can we cope? Thankfully, we are not alone in our journey. Paul, one of the earliest theologians and missionaries, a man who had a blinding vision from Christ, had a thorn like ours. Moses’ thorn was fear of speaking in public. Joseph’s thorns were eleven jealous brothers. Mary’s thorn was an unexpected and unexplainable pregnancy in a society not accepting of unwed mothers. David’s thorn was lust for the wives of other men. Thomas’ thorn was his need for proof. Peter’s was his reluctance to take risks. Jesus’ was a hometown expecting him to be the boy they knew years ago. There are thorns. But so many examples from the pages we love to read should send the message - a thorn in the flesh is no minor event, but it isn’t enough to stop us from moving, to stop us from getting it done, or to keep us from sharing God’ love.
How did Paul respond? Paul first responded in a way that many of us leave ‘til last, as some sort of final resort. Paul talked to God. He prayed for the thorn to be removed. It seems like such a simple thing to do. Talk to God? It seems almost too easy. So easy that we are tempted to regard it as worthless or ineffective. Do we take prayer seriously? It is easy to think that prayer is not a powerful aid to us in a time of need. However, in truth, what could be more effective than going straight to the source? If we truly believe that God is all powerful and all knowing, does not God have the answers we are looking for? If God is the Creator, isn’t God the one who will create new situations and options for us? If we don’t believe that praying to God can help us, it is only our lack of faith that perpetuates our problems. We should not misunderstand - prayer to God does not guarantee the response that we want - but it does guarantee a response, if we are willing to hear. So, how often do we really pray? Personally, the biggest aid in my prayer life was letting go of the idea that prayer has to be a formal, on-your-knees closed-eye time. Prayer can be like this, but it can be an eyes-open time, a while-your driving time. Prayer is a conversation with God. It can happen anytime, anywhere, any way you are comfortable. Any method that will help you talk to God is a method God will gladly accept. Paul knew where to look for help - he asked God for it.
God didn’t answer in a way Paul hoped, but Paul knew enough to accept God’s answer. That is the other key way in which Paul responded to his thorn. First, he asked for help in the right place. Second, he knew what to do when he got his answer. He turned his thorn into a blessing. Paul used his own sufferings as a way to show grace to others. Paul shared with others that his personal weakness did not matter because he had the strength of Christ and the gift of grace - and for Paul, and for us, if we have grace, what else could we truly need? So, how can we respond like Paul when we have a thorn in the flesh? We might be able to take action - if there is something you can do to remove your thorn - do it! Ask God to give you the strength. But if the thorn is out of your control, learn to see what good can come from your struggling. When Jesus was rejected by his hometown, he simply moved on to heal and teach elsewhere, and to send disciples to do similar work. Jesus wouldn’t allow the obstacle of the thorn to stop his ministry. We cannot be stopped either, because God has work for us to do. Paul said, “I am content with weaknesses insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities for the sake of Christ; for whenever I am weak, then I am strong.” We have a call to be content with our thorn, so that the grace of Christ may abound.
Paul’s thorn, and his response to the thorn all point to the most important lesson in the text, a greater understanding of Christ and the nature of Christ. God uses Paul’s thorn to show grace and power. Paul’s thorn turns into a blessing, not directly for Paul, but for those who interact with Paul. In Paul’s thorn, we see that God chooses to use even broken and flawed, faulty and weak vessels. Paul has a thorn in the flesh - but Paul is still the servant of God, an apostle bringing the good news and changing the lives around him forever. Moses had a thorn, but God used him to redeem the Chosen Israel from the hand of the Egyptians. God used Joseph, despite his thorns, to help the nations through great famine. Mary’s thorn of public shame through pregnancy turned into a precious gift of the Christ child. David’s thorn of lust taught him humility and eventually produced the wise Solomon. Thomas’ thorn of doubt gave us, the reader two thousand years later a chance to realize that our doubts and questions were ok to have. Peter, in spite of his thorns, was made the rock of the church. Jesus, through thorns, both figurative and literal, brought hope to a world buckling under the weight of sin and broken trust. If God can use all of these people despite their thorns, then surely God has a place for us too. Surely, God has grace for us too.
So let us boast, with Paul, in this: that through Christ, thought we are weak, we are made strong through grace. Though we are pained with thorns, yet God uses us as instruments of good news. Though we are flawed, we receive the good gift of grace. Indeed, it seems that we, the people of God, are most richly blessed.
Let us pray: Dear God, we are plagued with thorns. We struggle to understand our trials. We hesitate to turn to you for help. Urge us to come to you with our thorns. Use us despite our failures. Let us boast, and boast in you and your love. Amen.